It's non-uniform day. All the popular kids will be wearing the same clothes. You want to wear your different, unusual clothes but you don't wan to get any grief. What do you do? Do you wear them or not?

Most of us have been in this situation but what do we do? The above describes one type of peer pressure that most young people will go through. There is no right or wrong answer but the consequences are what make our decisions. Some people would say “I’d wear it anyway because I don’t care what others think, I’m just me.” However others would be subject to peer pressure whether they want to stand out, fit in or be invisible. These decisions depend on what we as people can cope with and whether we are feeling vulnerable.

We always hear about avoiding the type of peer pressure that gets young people into trouble such as smoking, taking drugs and drinking.We sometimes do these things to feel wanted and to fit in with the popular kids. It is usually a bad decision as we end up in trouble and are unhappy being something we’re not.

However a lot of peer pressure is a lot more subtle than this but it still has a strong affect.
Some of us want to be individuals and stand out but not get noticed for doing so (if you get what I mean! – we want to be our own person but feel we can’t because of what other people may say). We often feel we have to keep our inner selves hidden just so we don’t get bullied for being what we truly are.

This is where I come in. As I am growing up I’ve changed like all young people do. I’ve realised who I am and what I like. I don’t like to copy people because I enjoy being different. I enjoy wearing bright colours especially my orange skinny jeans! I like listening to Indie/rock music and playing guitar. It might sound normal to some but at my school I get called a Goth, Mosher, Emo or some such label, which I find really ignorant. Partly because I hate being labelled and partly because they don’t even know the meaning of the labels they use!



Falling in with the wrong crowd often leads to:

Young people becoming obsessed with feeling they have to be like someone else
 Young people making wrong decisions in life
 Young people doing things they aren’t ready for
Truancy and failing in school

I considered wearing my bright skinny jeans to school on non-uniform day but backed out because I didn’t want to face the comments I’d get. I’m one of those people that prefer to keep myself to myself unless I’m with my close friends. I’m really happy when I’m doing my own thing, listening to the music I like, wearing the clothes I love. I would hate to be unhappy just to please other people. Outside of school when I’m with my friends I feel great and enjoy looking a bit different and eccentric…because it’s me!

The more I think about it the more I know it’s better to be an individual because as I get older I will be a lot more mature. I’ve basically written this article to have a bit of a rant. I also wanted to tell other young people like me that being an individual is a better way of life than being unhappy trying to ‘fit in.’ Everyone eventually finds their inner self if they choose to look for it and I think the earlier you let it out the better it is later on in life. You will realise you are so much better than all those that bully people for being different.

In my opinion being original is much better than being a clone. I think that a few years of ‘suffering’ in school with clones is much better than ‘suffering’ for the rest of your life being something you’re not.
Tips on how to minimise being singled out

Concentrate on your own feelings and beliefs about what is right and wrong. Tell yourself to do what you want not what someone else wants you to do.
Be confident in yourself. Don’t feel bad for not doing the things you don’t want to do. Doing your own thing will help you gain self esteem.
Find someone else who is in a similar situation to you. Together learn to say ‘No’ or wear the clothes you want.
Try and help someone else who is in the same situation as you. If they are quieter than you, offer them help and advice.
Learn to ignore those that give you grief, the more you ignore them the less they will retaliate.
Choose 5 things you want to do but feel you can’t. Every so often just go ahead and do one of these 5 things! Start with something small like answering a question in class. Then continue until you have done them all…keep going if you want to!

Peer influence can be a good thing...
Positive peers can have a good influence on others. Here are a few examples:
Someone teaching you a new technique on your guitar.
Admiring a friend for their confidence to wear eccentric clothes.
Getting a friend into a new band.

If you get enough positive peers together, you can all figure out what is right and wrong and do what is best for you instead of others.

Jennifer Miller