Since schools and young people have existed so has the bully. We all know the stereotypes of bullies, but in the last few years technology has taken bullying to a whole new level. Kavita Donkersley-Khan investigates cyber bullying and shows how we can beat the byte size bullies…

The internet and mobile phones are great inventions and their biggest fans are young people. They allow us to make new friends and keep up to date with our peers. However the freedom of these tools also leaves them open to abuse and both technologies allow for a wide range of misuse. One of the most widespread and harmful is Cyber bullying, which I myself have experienced.

So what is cyber bullying?
Teachernet.gov.uk defines cyber bullying as “The use of Information and Communication Technology (ICT), particularly mobile phones and the internet, to deliberately upset someone else." According to a recent government study, over a third of 12 to 15-year-olds have faced some kind of cyber-bullying and if enough isn’t done to stop it, the number will continue to rise.

How is cyber bullying carried out?
Examples of cyber bullying stretch far and wide. I was the subject of malicious gossip and insults through someone else’s social networking site. Other examples are harassment, threats, unauthorised publication of private information, impersonation and so-called ‘happy slapping’ - where victims are recorded while being attacked.

The affects of cyber bullying
As with any type of bullying, cyber-bullying can have mild and devastating affects. My ordeal made me feel angry and upset. It made me believe what they said was true, even though I knew in my heart they were only saying it to hurt me. I felt cheated by someone I thought I knew better and that my chance to defend myself had been taken away by a cowardly act. Although much of cyber bullying isn’t physical, words are extremely powerful. Cyber bullying can shatter self confidence, ruin friendships and contribute to struggles a young person may already be facing. One such case, where it is believed to have contributed to the death of a 13 year old, is that of Megan Meier. The impersonation of a woman pretending to be a 16 year old boy through MySpace, is said to have push Megan to have hung herself following messages of abuse that ended in "The world would be a better place without you."

Cyber bullying - why and who?
Bullying is a coward’s way of upsetting someone and as technology has the advantage of being anonymous, it can draw more young people into bullying.

Some instances of cyber bullying are unintentional. We may not realise how harmful we’re being or a joke between friends may go too far on a social networking site, where others can see. One saying used to stamp out Cyber bullying is “Laugh at it and you’re part of it”.

As in the real world bullies look for fear or weaken in who they pick on. Some have been victims of bullying themselves and use the cyber world to experiment with bullying and as a way of gaining control. Research also shows that unlike in the physical world, where boys are more likely to bully, the cyber world attracts more female bullies.

Why cyber bullying is such a problem?
Cyber bullying is a very new problem and the flexibility of technology makes it harder to find clear boundaries in the quest to stop it. Bullies can not only be anonymous, they can also access their victims at any time, anywhere - be it school or the apparent safety of their bedroom. Thus making it easier to carry out than conventional bullying and harder for schools to know when it is their issue, or indeed if it’s an issue at all. Some sadly still believe that sticks and stones may break bones but words don’t have consequences.

If you're bullying
We all have moments when we bitch about people, and some of us don’t really care about whether we’re found out, but we all need to realise that being horrible over the internet is unacceptable and cowardly. And like bullying as a whole, it can affect someone so much more, if they are going through other problems that we’re not aware of. Next time we get the urge to use technology in a way that may upset someone else, be it bitching over Bebo or spreading gossip via mobile, we need to stop and think how we would feel if it was directed at us. Cyber bullying is for cowards. Those who support Cyber bullies are sheep. And, no matter who they are, NOBODY deserves to be cyber bullied.

By Kavita Donkersley-Khan